bonding with your baby
It often starts before birth but may take longer than you think.
Creating the ties that bind
It helps to realize that adoptive parents, who often are not present at their child’s birth, are capable of bonding as closely as birth parents. This was true for Marla Malkin, 37, a public-relations executive in Southern California. “I wasn’t in the delivery room when my daughter was born,” she says. “But my husband and I spent five days in a hotel room with her after she was born [because of the state’s waiting period]. We just put away the rest of the world, and we bonded with her immediately.”
It also helps to know that our physiology aids the process. “Every time you hold, nurse or otherwise take care of your baby,” Sears explains, “you get a burst of oxytocin, which has been called the ‘hormone of love.’”
Here are some other ways to promote bonding:
- Talk and read to your baby.
- Look into his eyes when you feed, bathe and dress him.
- Savor the time with your baby. Let the world fade away; it will be there when you’re ready to re-emerge.