The early weeks of pregnancy are fragile—and confusing. Here, the answers to your questions.
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My friends were all incredibly supportive when I told them what was going on. I didn’t know how to tell my parents, but it was Jason who I was really petrified of. Three weeks into getting his life back on track and just forging a relationship with his toddler daughter (the result of a one night stand) who lived back in his hometown, I knew he wasn’t going to be jumping for joy to say the least.
My mom took the news better than expected, as I was her only child and she had been harassing me about grandchildren for years. Although she was shocked and nervous that I was potentially going to be a single mother, she told me that she fully supported me and would help any way she could. My dad, 80 years old, was a little more difficult, using the word “abortion” five too many times, but eventually he came around.
I knew I had to tell Jason sooner rather than later as it was obvious that I wouldn’t be able to sleep more than two hours at a time until I got it off my chest, and though I knew he was highly emotionally unstable and wasn’t going to take this news with ease, I was not at all prepared for the tornado that was going to devastate the terrain of my mental well-being.
I told him that I needed to talk to him about something in person, and he said he couldn’t handle a serious conversation and requested that I correspond via email. I composed a short and direct email explaining that I was pregnant, it was his and that I was keeping the baby. I explained that I didn’t think I could get pregnant because of a medical condition and that I knew the timing was bad, but that I didn’t expect anything of him one way or the other. I also told him to take as much time as he needed to process everything.
Within five minutes my phone was ringing and I was greeted with a madman on the other end of the line. Using words like “psycho,” “c**t,” and “b**ch,” he proceeded to inform me that he didn’t love me, in fact, he didn’t even like me, that I would be an awful mother and that he didn’t want to have a child with me.
I hung up on him and over the next 24 hours was drowned in abusive voice mails and slanderous text messages, whispering sweet nothings like “Use the one shred of intelligence you have and do the right thing,” “I hope you die you manipulative b**ch,” (because obviously, I wanted to get impregnated with the child of an unemployed musician?) and “If you tell my parents, they will hate you forever.” At the end of the manic spree, I changed my locks and spoke to a lawyer about getting a restraining order.
This was not how I imagined the first week of pregnancy.
*All names have been changed to protect the guilty
Part 1: Sexy and Single in the City of Angels
--Leah Ornstein is a freelance writer, who recently relocated to Charlottesville, Virginia from Los Angeles. She is currently working on her first novel