No Holds Barred!
Here are some additional gripes, revelations and guilty admissions posted at truemomconfessions.com:

“I wish I was nauseous like I was during pregnancy. That way I could lose weight because I would barely want to eat. But I’m so stressed out with the baby that I eat everything in sight.”

“How am I supposed to be OK with going back to work full time when the only time I see my daughter is for her 4 a.m. and 7 p.m. feedings? This is killing me.”

“I hate myself for gaining so much weight during my pregnancy and then failing to lose it. Now I have a flabby stomach that hangs all over the place. I’m scared that I’ll never feel beautiful again.”

“I promised myself I wouldn’t let my son watch any TV until age 2, like the American Academy of Pediatrics guidelines say, but I haven’t followed through. My 1-year-old starts dancing when the Family Guy theme song
comes on. He is so calm and happy when he’s watching TV, and it’s so much easier for me. But I feel so guilty.”

“Sometimes, when I’ve had a really hard day, I just want to watch Oprah in peace. I put the baby in her crib and let her scream. I turn up the volume on the TV so her crying doesn’t drown out my show. I feel so guilty about this, but I just need a break.”

“My beautiful boy is the best blessing any mother could hope for, yet sometimes when he cries endlessly, I just want to hurt him or yell at him. I know I won’t follow through on these thoughts, but they won’t go away. I’m afraid that if I tell my husband,
it’ll be used against me.”

 

True Mom Confessions

Here's what experts have to say about real moms' secrets and those you might be harboring.

1 | Page 2 | 3

"When I was pregnant, my husband was so afraid of dislodging the baby that we went my entire pregnancy without sex. Now, because I'm breastfeeding, he still feels like he's sharing me with the baby. I don't want to go another year without sex!"

Expert Advice: Carve out time for you and your husband to be together without the baby, even if it's just for one hour a week. "This can help re-establish your connection and make him feel like a partner rather than just a parent," says Levine.
Ease into physical contact by having a make-out session or a massage. Let him know your desires, and in the meantime get a good vibrator to satisfy yourself, advises Levine."While it's a different experience than partnered sex, it's pleasurable and, best of all, asure thing."
If he's still not interested in sex, consider couples therapy, or have him see a therapist on his own.To find a certified sex therapist, contact the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists at aasect.org.

"I'm terrified of having a second."

"I'm pregnant with my second child and worry that I won't love this baby as much as my first."

Expert Advice: "The love for a child is so overwhelming and so unlike any other relationship a woman has that she often can't imagine feeling that same kind of intensity again," says cognitive behavioral therapist Marsha Candela, M.S.W., clinical manager of behavioral health at the Henry Ford Health System in Detroit. But it will happen--really! The bond with your second baby may be different, but within a family, Candela notes, differences are a good thing.

"I'm afraid I might love our second child more than our first. Our son has a temper, and I worry that I'll compare this tantrumming toddler to our cuddly baby and prefer the baby."
"When we think of the idyllic moments spent with a sweet, delicate newborn, most of us would choose that over battling wills with a 2-year-old," says Candela. But toddlers also laugh and hug and make funny comments. Caring for your sweet but needy infant may actually make you appreciate your toddler more, especially at 2 a.m., when you have to drag yourself out of bed to feed your baby while your toddler is, thankfully, sound asleep.

"I hate breastfeeding."

"Instead of making me feel bonded to my daughter, I feel like she's a leech sucking the life out of me. I feel there is something very wrong with me because the whole act disgusts me. Every day I pray that she will reject breastfeeding."

Expert Advice: If breastfeeding just isn't for you, pumping is a great option if you'd like to provide breast milk for your baby, says Melissa Kotlen Nagin, a certified lactation consultant in New York City, who writes breastfeeding.about.com. "Breast milk will still provide the same power coming from a bottle." A bottle is much healthier for your baby than a daily dose of resentment from you.
"Also pump and store a bank of milk in your freezer so your husband can feed the baby and give you a well-deserved break," Nagin suggests. If you get into the routine of pumping in the morning, when your milk supply is most plentiful, you won't feel so tied down.

1 | Page 2 | 3

February/March 2009