Pregnancy Sex: Embarrassing (But Totally Normal) Things You Don't Need to Worry About

There may be some surprises along the way, but rest assured—what you're experiencing is totally normal.

Pregnancy Sex George Rudy/Shutterstock
No more birth control, no more ovulation calculations—pregnancy sex should be amazing, right? "Think of sex in pregnancy as the one time in your life when you and your partner can enjoy unprotected sex and not have to worry about missing a period," says Tracy Donegan, midwife and founder of GentleBirth. But with all those body changes and worrying about what's okay for your baby, you may find yourself with more concerns than you thought. Here, we get answers to your biggest questions.

What's up with my libido?

During the first trimester—when you're battling morning sickness and fatigue—sex may be the last thing on your mind. "Often after the first trimester moms-to-be can find their libido comes back," says Donegan. For some women, their libido is even stronger than before.

Will sex hurt the baby?

"The simple answer is no—regardless of how well-endowed your partner is," says Donegan.

However, spotting during sex isn't uncommon. "In general, if it occurs immediately after sex and is a small amount it is nothing to be concerned about," says Terry Hoffman, MD, an OB/GYN at Mercy's Family Childbirth and Children's Center. "Due to the increased blood flow the cervix can bleed from being rubbed by a penis or finger." However, if it is heavier bleeding, like a period, you should stop and call your doctor.

What positions work best?

There really aren't any rules to pregnancy sex other than finding a comfortable position. "As your bump grows, side lying is a great option," says Donegan. Missionary style will be a thing of the past before long. "I generally recommend reclining from behind or hands and knees on the edge of the bed with him standing, but you should do what works best," says Dr. Hoffman.

What's going on with my breasts?

Don't be surprised if your breasts suddenly leak during sex. "If it's a first pregnancy, a woman may leak a clear or slightly opaque liquid," says Dr. Hoffman. "If she has had a child, especially recently and is still breastfeeding or stopped recently, significant breast foreplay could lead to breast leakage." Your breasts may also be more sensitive, which could require a change in how they're handled during sex.

What other changes might happen?

As your pregnancy progresses you might find you feel a lot "juicier" than normal, and the extra blood flow to the pelvis can heighten sensation. "Some women start to experience hotter than usual dreams and can even orgasm in their sleep," Donegan says. "Orgasms flood your body, and your baby's, with oxytocin and endorphins, giving you and your baby a wonderful sense of well-being." She notes that you may find your bump tightens during orgasm and that feeling lasts for a while. Some moms mistaken this for a sign of labor, but it's quite normal. "An orgasm a day keeps the blues away in my book – think of it as an instant stress reducer."