3. What’s your job’s maternity policy?
It’s worth reviewing this now so you have a better idea of how much time you’re allowed, what your pay will be when you’re on leave, whether this year’s vacation time can roll over into your maternity leave, and so on, says Twenge. Maternity policies vary widely so it’s best to know what your company’s rules are. Check out his paternity policy and what those options would be as well. If his company allows him leave, you might want to plan the timing so he’s home with the baby once you go back to work. Related to that, if you have a profession that’s seasonal (perhaps a teacher or an accountant), you can consider planning your pregnancy or birth around that.
See more: Real life working moms-to-be
4. How has your relationship been lately?
If your relationship has been rocky for some time, seeking a relationship counselor now is a good idea. “Don’t go into pregnancy thinking that pregnancy and having a baby is going to improve your relationship,” says Twenge. “It might bring you closer. But there are a lot more things to fight about.” When a baby arrives, there’s a lot of work to be done and you’re going to need strong communication and negotiation skills. If your relationship is already hitting serious snags, adding a baby could likely lead to bigger problems. Work on you two first before adding a very squeaky (yet adorable) third wheel.
See more: Is your relationship babyproof
5. Are you BOTH ready for more chores?
Sure your guy may joke around and say he’s never going to change a diaper, but it’s better to find out how serious he is (and whether you’re okay with that) before your stinky new addition arrives. It’s a good idea to also discuss midnight feedings, laundry, late-night store runs, and overall household tasks that are going to seem to triple once you’ve got a baby.